New and events of the Philadelphia Bar Asso.
Issue link: https://thephiladelphialawyer.epubxp.com/i/434516
office to suggest that, perhaps further punishment might be "gilding the lily" (yes, he said that too). In short, the matter would be terminated and my client returned to general population forthwith. "Forsooth," I replied, in kind. Louie was returned to general population where he continued to have problems based upon the continuing investigation of Sperm-Boy's successful stab at becoming a father. Although indictments were in fact returned against others in that matter, including, of course, the new dad himself, no charges were ever brought against Little Louie. At some later time, I actually came across a full exposition of the case, and was surprised to learn I had forgotten that the case involved a civil lawsuit, not a criminal prosecution; and that it was Tuberville, the plaintiff, who had uttered the conditional language (never actually mentioning his sword), which triggered a beating at the hands of Savage, whose defense to the suit for tortuous injury was that Tuberville had threatened him. Against the possibility, however remote, that the reader is interested in the exact language employed by the court in awarding judgment for the plaintiff, the opinion follows: Action of assault, battery, and wounding. The evidence to prove a provocation was that the plaintiff put his hand upon his sword and said, "If it were not assize-time, I would not take such language from you." – The question was, If that were an assault? The court agreed that it was not; for the declaration of the plaintiff was, that he would not assault him, the judges being in town; and the intention as well as the act makes an assault. Therefore if one strike another upon the hand, or arm, or breast in discourse, it is no assault, there being no intention to assault; but if one, intending to assault, strike at another and miss him, this is an assault; so if he hold up his hand against another in a threatening manner and say nothing, it is an assault – in the principal case the plaintiff had judgment. I have no doubt that the court's opinion would sound like music if read in Louie's native Italian, but remembering how those prosaic words brought Little Louie a measure of freedom, they were indeed sweet music to the eyes. Steve LaCheen (slacheen@concentric. net), a partner with LaCheen, Wittels & Greenberg, is a member of the Editorial Board of The Philadelphia Lawyer. At some later time, I actually came across a full exposition of the case, and was surprised to learn I had forgotten that the case involved a civil lawsuit, not a criminal prosecution; and that it was Tuberville, the plaintiff, who had uttered the conditional language (never actually mentioning his sword), which triggered a beating at the hands of Savage, whose defense to the suit for tortuous injury was that Tuberville had threatened him.